Lovely Ass Lumps

At the request of my good friend Mike Sleep, I will be talking today about hemorrhoids.

So, first the basics. What is a hemorrhoid? Basically, they are varicosities or swelling of your butt's blood vessels. Hurts to sit on 'em, apparently.

What causes one to develop one of these suckers? Well, I'm glad you asked. You can be genetically predisposed to them, which really sucks. Bad genes could lead to weaker ass tissue, which makes it easier to get them. However, trying too hard when taking a dump can also cause one, even without bad genes. In fact, sometimes even having bad posture can make a person develop one.

If you have bad genes though, don't worry. Avoiding them is not too tricky. All you need to do is drink lots of water, keep your fiber intake high (which is a good idea anyways) and exercise a lot. Simple as that.

So thank you Mike, for encouraging this very informative entry... and for providing that very appropriate and professionally drawn image.